A new, on-going feature at Mojopost is How To Break Things. As I mentioned last week, I’m attempting to put away convenient, handy tools and using whatever else I find handy for a job. More likely than not, things might be broken along the way. The reason I’m doing this is obscure and hard to explain, but I can honestly assure you that this is a considerate attempt to understand human creativity at a more organic level. Also, I’m uniquely attuned to destruction because I have been divorced twice.
Earlier this week, I decided to take a proactive approach at keeping my cat, Bebe, from climbing into my clothes closet and destroying my nice shirts. What happens is that she pulls open the louvre doors with her claws and climbs up my shirts to get to the sweater shelf. Once there, she can sleep in peace and leave behind copious amounts of fur. She has shredded some clothes I like to wear in public – clothes that made me feel cool and “with it”. I don’t know about you, but chic is hard to come by for me and that is why it is important to stop Bebe.
Technophiles might think about using electric shock collars on their cats. I considered this, and there was an invisible electric fence on Google I could have installed around my closet, but it carried more risk than I was willing to bear. I’m no PETA hippy, but tasering kitty is simply not on my agenda and it never will be. That is why I decided to go low budget and low-tech.
Bungee cords are kind of amazing. What I did is wrap a bungee cord around the closet door handles. Bebe can no longer open the doors because the primitive power of Bungee (behold!) is greater than her paw torque. Bebe spent three days clawing the doors to try and make them open and I’m going to need to sand and paint, but at least she can no longer use my seductive disco shirts as a ladder.
My wardrobe closets and their corded doors have given the condo a college dorm feel. I’ve had an urge to buy fawties and thought about shopping at Goodwill for pillbox hats and used shoes. On a whim, I ate Ramen Noodles (spicy chicken, fifty cents).
Low tech wins this week’s installment of How To Break Things.
A nod to college rock:
The Pixies – Here Comes Your Man
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