Thursday, September 24, 2009

Politics Of Love - New VH-1 Series with John Edwards

Morally impoverished former presidential candidate John Edwards is dating again. Which community college cutie from night school can win John's heart? Watch Politics Of Love, Monday at 9:00 PM on VH-1.

I spoke with Bret Michaels (Rock of Love, lead singer of Poison, douchebag) about dating on reality programs.

"For me, the experience was complicated by medical conditions I may or may not have. Finding the right women, who may or may not share these afflictions - burning, itching and whatnot - was a daunting task for the producers. Once we got everything in sync, I think we resolved my lack of depth with just the right amount of hair weaves, cleavage and Valtrex®."

Flavor Flav, asthmatic cocksman from Flavor of Love, also commented:

"People said my show could not be real, that is was too much to believe. What is not real about women with acrylic nails and breast implants fighting for the love of a short and ugly, but rich and famous man? I mean - hello? Have you SEEN Ron Perelman? And he had Ellen Barkin, when she was hot. I rest my case."

I asked John Edwards if he's still waiting for his wife to die, so that he can marry his baby mother. Edwards had no comment.

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