Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Wise Latina Festival 2009

Welcome to Day 45 of the Wise Latina Festival! Wise Latina organizers would like to thank members of the Republican Wise Latina Fan Club for promoting Wise Latinas every 30 minutes, with the exception of lunch breaks and extramarital affairs. I would like to nominate Sen. John Cornyn of Texas for Miss Wise Latina 2009. The winner of this crown will be entitled to wear Sonia Sotomayor as a hat for an entire year.



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Over the past 45 days I have enjoyed a variety of wise Latina products. Half baked, steamed, battered and fried.


At first I didn’t understand Republican’s fascination with the subject. Then I got aggravated because it kept coming up. Like many people, I came to the conclusion that it would be a good idea to connect a copper wire to my car battery and bite down as hard as I could. When the embers of my former self were extinguished, I realized that the Wise Latina Litmus Test is really the only test that matters when selecting a Supreme Court nominee.


This is my life now. I have decided to stay on with the festival and travel to cities near you, where the lot of us will sleep in tents and think of new ways to ask the same old questions. If anyone would like to stage an intervention, I don’t think it’s too late.


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12 comments:

Mojopo said...

By Monday afternoon, Republicans killed a great t-shirt slogan by repeating "wise latina" over and over. On Tuesday, the phrase became OLD - so old it was as ancient as "Ayyy, I'm the Fonz," or "Nanu nanu!" Today this phrase is uncomfortable. It is to the point that I would prefer senators to inquire about Sotomayor's menstrual cycle instead.

"Would you say today is a heavy flow day, or will you only require a panty liner?"

Speedy said...

Sonia had her 55th or 56th birthday in June. I seriously doubt she needs or wants to discuss her lack of menstrual cycle in any capacity. The Republitards continue to look like petty idiots. That's all we can ask for... =) Go tards in 2010!!!

Mojopo said...

I-m concerned. If Sotomayor refuses to confess that she is a witch, what next?

Speedy said...

I'm watching Arlen Specter try to grill Sonia with meaningless court cases. I feel like I need Depends. Now I have to go pee/poop myself....

Mojopo said...

Speedy, have you noticed that this isn't about her at all? It's about the senators and their feelings. Dr. Phil would say that they need to be recognized as equal partners in this relationship. I'm hearing criticism, when they really mean, "Sonia, do you love me?" It's sickening what happens on daytime TV.

Speedy said...

It would actually legitimize it in some way if Dr. Phil were there asking "Judge Sotomayor how does that make you feel?" It's all about party politics as usual in Washington. It makes me farty, prolly like Arlen. Why is he a Dem again????

Minnie-sota said...

Yes, was all about their re-election campaigns not about confirming a Supreme Court Justice. I yelled out "YAY" when our MN Senator Amy Klobuchar said she wasn't going to ask her about the wise latina comment.

anony tu said...

Mojo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You! Are! Kidding me!
I dropped this hit the day the festival began! How long does this stuff last?!! It's been 45 days?!!

Anonymous said...

I wish, we also had a wise latina festival. Can you guys send me a Sonia t-shirt?

LV

Mojopo said...

LV, I'll be on the lookout! lol

Your friend, Rusty said...

If the f'tards are going after her this hard, what the hell are they going to do if Obama gets the chance to name a real liberal to the Court?

Speedy said...

http://www.zazzle.com/confirm+sonia+sotomayor+gifts
I'm send off for one now!!! =)