Monday, November 10, 2008

Obama Spreads Wealth Like Virgin Thighs

What are you going to do with your $1,000 rebate check from Barack Obama? Haven’t you heard? According to the AM radio fat-face brain trust, President Elect Obama is going to be cutting checks to everyone who lives in the US, from Warren Buffet to your local terrorist cell. We’re in the money!

The rebate is the direct result of Fox News, Karl Rove and a giant windfall we are due for consuming so much energy. Did I say $1,000? I meant to say $10,000. Sarah Palin’s Alaska is going to cry when they see how rich we are.

Do you know how many Hickory Farms cheese baskets I can buy with $10,000? Wait, I mean $100,000 (every time I catch my breath, Gobama adds another zero to my largesse!).

Big fat money for cheese baskets and Hawaiian vacations. I don’t ever have to work again. As long as you people keep filling your gas tanks while driving around in circles all over Flaming Liarville, I’m going to get rich! Rich I say!

AM radio listeners, welcome to the land of change. Food stamps for lobster tails! Biracial babies on tap! I can’t wait to get my first embryonic stem cell facial! For free!


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Your friend, Rusty said...

"my first embryonic stem cell facial!"

Now, I'm afeared.

Mojopo said...

That's good on crackers, too.

Minnie-sota said...

What will I do with my rebate check? I'll come visit you! :-)

Anonymous said...

I'nm waiting for my gubament chack and cheese!!! :-)


p.s. Yeah!!! My laptop came back from Dell!!!