Wednesday, January 14, 2009

To MSM - A Friend Need Is A Liberal Indeed

Dear Mainstream Media:

Like you, I am a Liberal. Thanks for all your hard work last year to secure a position in government for Barack Obama! I could spend all day blowing sunshine up your Spanx about that (and the Palin thing), but I have a favor to ask of you. Ann Coulter is selling another book and she is polluting my television again. Can you help?

Here are some suggestions:

In print media, substitute a photo of Ms. Coulter for this:

This is also acceptable:

When Ms. Coulter appears on television, it would be very handy if you could accentuate her crazy eyes with two glowing red dots. Did you see the pig in Amityville Horror? Like that.

We are going to need the New York Times on board for the book review. It would be helpful if they ignore the real title of Ann’s book and refer to it as “A Pile Of My Own Waste by Ann Coulter”. I think they will do it for free.

Wait a hot minute - I’ve got an idea. How about you ignore her? No one has ever tried that before and it’s right out of left field! She would never see it coming. You are so welcome, dude. We’re in this together.

Your Pal,

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Anonymous said...

Ann Coulter is a hate monger and a media whore. I can't understand why people listen to the beotch. She say the most unintelligent, stupidest things. She is an unmitigated truck load of horse shit!!

p.s. I like the barfing woman... Does she have any pants on???

Minnie-sota said...

In that last photo, if you could get her red eyes to spin around, it would totally make my day. :-)

Mojopo said...

I don't know if she has pants. I thought the same thing as you, Speedy! I think the pants were swallowed up by her cavernous crotch.

Mojopo said...

I'll try Minnie! Hmmm....

Old Hippy said...

I choose to ignore "aimless Annie,"
"Billo the Clown" and "Hannity the
Noted with some delight that Faux Noise has lost millions lately.
Does anybody know what knuckle draggers listen to or watch the crap Murdoch put out?

Your friend, Rusty said...

I would be satisfied if they just question her on the merits of her ideas.

Liberal who publish books/produce movies don't even get that. I still remember the crap that Molly Ivins went through on her last book tour. Instead of questions about her book and the arguments she posed, fuctards instead asked her, "Why are liberals so angry?" It was maddening. And when Michael Moore is out promoting his movies he gets to deal with interviewers who lie about his movies.

J9 said...

Every time I see this, this creature I barf a little in my mouth.

PapaPig said...

Ann Coulter goes to the doctor with abdominal pains.

The doctor tells her not to worry she is just pregnant.

She says no way!! I only have anal sex!

The doctor looks back at her and says, congratulations, you are having a lawyer!

PS: Mojo, what is the deal with picking on the pig in Amityville Horror??

Though we were tighter than than, hmmpfff... :@)

Your first post that goes below 6 on a scale of 1 to 5...

an. t. said...

If we were going to eat Ann coulter, what the hell would we eat? Ann, the Twiggy look is over!! I will never eat you until you gain some weight.

Do I have time for this?

an. t. said...

Ms Mojo, I hear Rod Blagowago is mad as a hornet. I read it in the paper. It said he plans to fight back. Please, Ms Mojo, be careful! I do not want you to be swept away in the bloodshed when Blagoblag goes on his wild rampage.

Holy batshit! Look at the time! And I have no time! Why do you do this to me, Ms Mojopo?! You know I get up before God in the morning! You know I have to wear clothing and DRIVE to the place where it is said that I work! I thought you luffed me! When you luff somebody, let them go; they will come back a butterfly, or however the thing goes.

Anonymous said...

I'll get a nap while I'm driving. It's a long commute.

Mojopo said...

Papa, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to denigrate all pigs with my cheap allusions. Lets think of the Amityville pig, Jodi, as I recall, as your evil twin who is made of turkey.

My bad!

Mojopo said...

Anony - Ann Coulter is a type of flavor, not a food. No worries - it's easy to mistake her chicken neck for something edible. Ann Coulter is a type of dried bark. What happens is that you get a mortar and pestle and turn her into flakes. Ann Coulter is enjoyed by urolagnia fans, because it tastes like pee.

Thanks for bringing up Blago's fury. If Dan Rather could describe Blago's anger he might say:

"He's as mad as a hot tea kettle on a summer day."

He can suck it!

Mojopo said...

Old Hippy - the folks listen to Fox News because it's what is on TV. If they're too lazy to think, then they are way too lazy to change a channel.

PapaPig said...

Mojo, how do you know I am now Amityville Pig's evil cousin?

I can be nasty if asked nicely :@)