Tuesday, May 26, 2009


Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you! You came from a monkey, and you smell like one too! You can call her Ida, if you're nasty.


“UN Blasts North Korea”
Lil Kim Jong-il busted nuclear caps underground and now the diplomats are going buck-wild cray-zay. But they did NOT nuke him back!

“There was an EARTHQUAKE near Niagara Falls! I was in my garden when it happened but I did not feel a thing. I wish I did. It sounds exciting.”

“Oh! You must read ‘Dear Husband’ by Joyce Carol Oates.” The essays have open endings, she said, and it will keep you awake for hours.

I broke my rear bowling. At some point between stepping forward and letting go of the 50 lb. mass in my hand, a tragic, gripping pain occurred in the vicinity of my left butt cheek (go large!). Tuesday’s checklist: Find someone to fix my ass!

“Capt. Bob Cinelli sends word that there has been some very good fishing in 60 to 250 feet of water out in front of Olcott Beach from the surface down to 130 feet down using a variety of techniques. Spoons or Spin Doctors and flies are the way to go.”

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Anonymous said...

Hi Mojo!

Nice to hear the missing link has nothing to do with you accident. Ouch! I hope you get well soon.


Speedy said...

Last time I went bowling I did the same thing to my ass.... Nice picture!!!! =)

p.s What do you think of Sonia Sotomayor?

Mojopo said...

Speedy, in all honesty, I'm pretty grossed out that the conservative spin has been to paint Sotomayer as a "hotheaded Latin woman" and activist judge. Apparently, GOP'ers seem to hate it when judges work within the gray areas of law, because they like it when their judges just follow orders.

I think the media and the obstructionist-Repubs would have a gripe with anyone Obama picks. But the truth is that Sotomayer would bring more judicial experience to the bench than any other nominee appointed in the last 70 years.

Hmm, let me see: a moderate centrist woman with a shit-ton of experience? OMFG, that's horrible!

Both George HW and Bubba liked her. And she pissed off Al D-Amato, back in the day! I like anyone that could get under Al's skin.

Speedy said...

I hate the "hot headed latina" label. THAT really pisses me off!! She is truly a living example of The American Dream. I despise the "conservative" right and their bullshit spin fuck. Republicans delayed her career once because they were afraid she would eventually be a Supreme Court nominee. See where that got them!!! I think they should just scrap their party and start over....and call it Republifucks or something.

anony tu said...

Hi, Mojosan, I took care of the site while you were at the (bowling) spa, ja notice?

Sotomayer sounds good to me. That rates 2 points.

Your appeal to nuanced readers is exemplified by your inferred link between the mini-earthquake and your breaking your ass bowling. Did you cause the earthquake, one might wonder. That's two more points. Of course, any mention of your charming Mom rates another two points.

(PS -- For your broken butt hump: You can fix ANYTHING with duct tape, even ducts!)

Joyce Carol Oates is fantastic! 2 points!

Bill Hilts Fish Locator? I've been looking for my fish ALL DAY!!!! How'd you know? 2 points!

Let's see, that's 2+2+2+2+2=10!!! Another ten for you, Our Goddess!

(PPS-- Don't be fooling around with your avatar that way. I meditate on it when you're not here.)

a.t. said...

Oh, two points for making me do math. I need the practice.

skeeter...... said...

It was only a matter of time until a link was found..... but Ida doesn't sound too nasty.... LaVulvatina.

Lil Kim only farted. For a little guy he's got some atomic gas.

The last time I went bowling is a blog all by it's little self.

Suddenly I feel like goin' fishing.

Oh and Mojo..... thank a billion for checking out my blog. It's going sooooo well.

Speedy said...

I'm watching the evil Fox Newsies pick this Sotomayer apart. She had the ordacity to say “I would hope that a wise Latina woman with the richness of her experience would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a white male who hasn’t lived that life.” I don't see a problem with a statement like that...but then again I'm not a Republifuck.

Mojopo said...

Anony - I just read your comments on the Dick blog and replied. WHEEEE!

I so dropped the Sotomayer ball today. So, I will write her bio this evening in Spanish. Babelfish will be provided at no extra charge!

Mojopo said...

Speedy - you gotta shut off the FOX. I swear by it. I'm convinced that half of their audience is a bunch of liberals looking for ammo. Have you seen lib blogs the day after FOX says something exceptionally inflammatory? MILES and MILES of righteous indignation! I can't bear it anymore.

PapaPig said...

I am guilty. I watch FOX to see where they are going. Damn it I have a Tivo so they can poll it easy to find out what I watch. Not that they poll everyone but they do more Tivo's than other receivers.

But how can I tell what they are doing? Plus if I only let the liberal media I put them in the position of brain washing me (which I believe they try anyway).

I just don't trust anyone any more. We had to stop McCain and I have no regrets for helping that cause and damn glad we did.

But I am now seriously worried about Obama acting more and more like just another politician. Spookily like Bill Clinton.

Mojopo said...

Papa, I used to watch FOX and listen to Rush and then get the other side from cable news. I wanted to know what the conservatives were up to, and I felt it was important to balance out my own liberal views. Plus, I could get the shorthand spin from watching either lib or conservative programs. When I was off-line for a few months there, I saw no news. It was kind of a blessing in disguise because it forced me to listen to NPR more and read whatever papers I could get my hands on. I found that I don't want to go back to watching the cable news shows as much anymore. I see it sometimes through the week or not, and I don't miss it. This is weird for me, because I was a news junkie. I still love news and politics, but in a different way. I think of my news diet as a portion control plan, in that I'm consuming only as much as I need and the quality I'm taking in is better for me.

P.S. - I wanted to say hello to Skeeter, and say that I still like yer blog! You do with it what you must!

Anonymous said...

Hey! we have a new poll!


Minnie-sota said...

Hi, Mojo. I took a wee break from the Internet over the weekend but now I'm back. Lovely picture, hah!