Dear Dollar Menu Fans:
I thought you might like to know what the White House served for the G20 Summit On Financial Markets and The World Economy. Mmmm! They even thought about the right wines.
Did you know? Presidents pay for their own groceries while living in the White House. However, when the US hosts luncheons and state dinners U.S. taxpayers foot the bill.
As you were enjoying exactly three Chicken McNuggets and squirting packets of complimentary Arby's Sauce down your throat for nourishment, your leaders were dining on fruitwood-smoked Quail with Quince Gastrique, rack of lamb, baked Brie and $300 bottles of wine.
May I offer an alternative menu?
Dumpster-dived greens from behind Costco
Subway water soup
A microscopic fraction of Spam on Saltine crackers
Super-Target turkey loaf with the gravy of bourgeois tears
Ramen noodles served in the trunk of American cars
Sunny-D with Isopropyl Alcohol
One-eighth of a toasted marshmallow
Before you tie on your paper towel bib, a word from our sponsor.
Dig in, ya’all!