I thought I read the number wrong, so I blinked and rubbed my eyes. When I refocused on the unemployment rate, it never gave an inch. More than 8.7 million people in the US are unemployed. The way I see it, we’ve got to fix this hot mess in real time, fast. But how?
First, we are going to get happy. That one is a major hurdle, but I think we can work it out. Second, I will commit to posting job listings once a week from assorted cities and Third, we are going to get through this.
If you are an unhappy and unemployed person, you run the risk of jumping in front of a speeding dump truck or committing a robbery. Look at me – right in the eyes. DO NOT! You are too pretty for a closed casket and you are not cut out for jail. Yes – of course money would make you happy. In lieu of cash, I’m going to ask you to think of something that makes you happy. Me? I visit the local animal shelter and take puppies for walks. Oh yeah – I said it! I am so unashamed. But you are different. You require effort and creativity. Do you know what makes you happy? Tell me. You and I will try and put more of that into your day. It makes me happy to help you. Thanks for that chance.JOB LISTINGS
FloridaGET THROUGH THIS
Orkin Pest Control - Lawn Care Supervisor
Have you ever watered a lawn, or directed other people on the finer points of lawn watering and pest control? Here’s your big break.
Ochsner Health System - Receptionist
Are you able to use a phone? Do you know what a computer is? Are you able to be nice to people? If your answer is yes and you have a high school diploma, get a J-O-B with a health care provider and receive awesome benefits. Act now!
DFS Hawaii – Sales Support
People with a strong back and good math skills are encouraged to apply. If you have ever seen a warehouse, you could probably do this job. Work in paradise and stimulate the economy! What are you waiting for?
In a former life I was a Human Resources person. What this means is that I am able to separate the wheat from the chaff when it comes to resumes. I can smell a shine-job from about a hundred bazillion miles away – as far as Saturn, at least. I was the person who interviewed you and I am scary good at it. If you need a hand with your resume and cover letter, or pointers on interviews, perhaps I can help. Let me know! I’m serious!Further, I think you look wonderful today. Let’s dance.
The Beatles – I Want To Hold Your Hand