Monday, February 02, 2009

Mojopoll: We Should Tax Republicans













I have this little thing that I like to call Mojopoll. It is a dandy substitute for hard science, in that I get to ask readers a set of leading questions that support my own point of view on any given subject. Big fun for everyone!

Lo and behold, you read my mind about the economy last week and how to fix it. Both us agreed that we need to tax the hell out of Republicans (67%). Moral and fiscal irresponsibility should come with a fat price tag, that’s why! We could end their wars and eat ‘em with Grey Poupon (after we drill the Bush family for oil). Yes we can! Yes we can! Yes we can!

Speaking of Republicans, did you see what the GOP did last week? They erected Michael Steele to be the first black Republican Party leader. I beg your pardon, but the Democrats did that "first black leader thing" all ready (and their candidate was NOT just some black guy). Is this new Republican appointment related to the Equal Opportunity Act, because if so – I’m confused. I thought Republicans hated affirmative action. Who the hell is this Michael Steele? Supposedly, he was a black lieutenant governor from Maryland and he has appeared on cable television. Stunning. Christ, they could have saved some time if they just put John Boehner in black face make-up.

With this subject in mind, I developed a new Mojopoll. Your answers could influence the Republican Party, going forward. The poll is on the right – multiple choice, as always.

Which race, creed or color do you prefer?

Don't be a hater. It skews the results. Thanks, and have a happy Monday!

Cyrkle - Red Rubber Ball



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16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh! with "tax republicans" you didn't mean, we should pay taxes for having them?! Now it makes sense!

LV

Mojopo said...

LV, good morning! I would recommend that we tax natural born Republicans, if only there was something natural about it. I say because it seems to me that Republicanism acquired condition for white males and people who live on AM radio talk shows.

Anonymous said...

Mojo, did your pals talk about us after or before the drinks?

LV

James said...

It's sort of like a "vice tax" for rapacious economic behavior.

Anonymous said...

It's a tax for being an natural born, NRA lovin' a$$hole LV. Michael Steele.... whateva man wahteva! He'll end up being the male Sharah Palin of 2012.


\\Speedy//

PapaPig said...

Wait, I resemble that statement.

I am a weirdo granted, but I am an NRA loving, Volvo driving liberal pinko. Best of both worlds.

Micheal Steele has actually been pushing for the job for a while. Despite their obvious copycat choice, he is such a good choice, it should make Dems a little weary at the least.

anony tu said...

Okay, but if they can't afford their taxes, we eat them, right?

Oh, I won't even have to lobby for my choice on this new Mojopoll. Who in their right mind doesn't love Sasquatches?

I was told by a friend that I should read the Tao of Pooh. The same friend who told me I should read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Repair. Why?! I asked. Because it's about Taoism, she said. So? I asked. Taoism is neat! she said. It wasn't neat before Winnie the Pooh became a Taoist? I asked.

See, I hate pop culture when it tries to be enlightening. Bah humbug! Sex, drugs, and zydeco!

a.t. said...

Oh my god I just looked at the poll results! Who in THE fuck is voting Martians?!!! Martians want to destroy the human race, you silly butts! If it weren't for microbes, they would have already done it many times over! No! WE ARE NOT GOING MARTIAN!! DO YOU HEAR ME!!!

Minnie-sota said...

Mojo, I'm having a hard time deciding between Sasquatch and Pooh. Wait. That's Winnie the Pooh, not just Pooh. Oh pooh. I'm fer Sasquatches.

Minnie-sota said...

A.T., of course we aren't Martian. We are Cylon.

cyclotourist said...

Green Pinko of course. I don't think ANY stimulus $$$ should go to a Red State. Suck on that one, Texas!

PapaPig said...

Sheep, I would have added Sheep to the list. Soft and fluffy like cute little clouds. Tissue and toilet paper (back to the poop thing) use clouds to inspire a feeling of softness. Why not Sheep?

You people are sheepaphobic, good grief.

Mark Spitz may take a hit on the bong now and then, but I bet if asked he likes sheep.

We know Michael Steele likes Sheep, all Reps do a sheep now and then.

Soft little cute fluffy clouds.

Mojopo said...

Hi, Papa. Yes, Michael Steele has been working hard to secure his place in the world. So did John Boehner, but he opted out of appealing in his cred in black face. Probably a good call.

What is the difference between a sheep and a lamb? No, I'm serious.

Anonymous said...

Good Moning, Mojo! To your serious question, from one you get cheese from the other chop.

LV

Anonymous said...

you are so right, minnie! The Lords of Kobol and the Cylon God is also my religion!

LV

a.t. said...

The difference between sheep and lamb is succulence.